Aussie Showers

Shower watch...this weekend (Game 5) someone else showered....55-2 ...yes you guessed it another Pom. Big Allen...No that's not why he showered..

The Ashes are coming and I am testing out the famous Aussie 'sense of humour' as displayed by Ricky 'butch' Ponting.


Some observations

• Aussie Teeth. The hugely expensive part pay health Service means that many...(most) have terrible teeth. One line I heard recently...'Their are so many gaps in your teeth it looks like your tongues in Jail.'
• The Aussies do have a huge inferiority complex. A few days ago, General Tommy Franks was giving a press conference on the state of the war. “What do you think of the quality of the Australian troops under your command?” an intrepid reporter from down-under asked. The whole room burst into laughter at this embarrassing plea for approval. “Excellent” the General replied with a laugh. Closing Camera shot was of the whole room in hysterics.
• Most Aussies are either so polite you want to slap them, or so rude you want to punch them.
• The crappy television. Aussie commercial TV stations are like American ones without the imagination or the budget. A two hour movie quickly turns into a four hour marathon once you add in the commercials.
• All the macho garbageThere is a certain breed of Australian male, that only exists in order to prove he isn't gay. This largely consists of aggressive driving, owning dangerous dogs, getting drunk, starting fights and insulting strangers. Every pub has at least three of these guys out to ruin everyone else's night. Could the 'macho' stuff be to hide their true feelings...maybe that's why they don't shower with me
• Their refusal to admit that we Brits are better than them. Try the old superiority ruse out here, and you’ll quickly be knocked down to size. They are quick to point out their sporting prowess, booming economy, Academy award winning actors, better food etc etc etc. My mention of the Beatles and Shakespeare are dismissed as yesterday’s news..... Smug bastards.

Stew