LEG BEFORE WICKED

Hello all. I couldn't resist this.

In events recalling Dennis Lillee’s notorious aluminium cricket bat, the Ashes series opened with the Australian team complaining about the new high-tech bat being used by the English tourists.
‘It’s cheating!’ said Australian captain, Ricky Ponting. ‘It completely takes all the legside fielders from the game. There’s no need for a leg slip, a leg gully, square leg, not even a third leg…’
Clearly distraught, Australia’s Justin Langer lamented the effect the new bat would have on the batsman’s game. ‘There’ll be no leg glances, no leg drives, and none of those lovely chances to tickle the ball off the legs.’
Meanwhile, the English team have insisted that the new bat doesn’t contravene the laws of the game. ‘We love it, yeah, yeah, yeah,’ said an unrepentant Andrew Flintoff.
'They don't have a leg to stand on" commented Duncan Fletcher....